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Lord Theodore's Drop Centre :: General :: Tortall Fanfiction :: Poles (Grizzly)

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Topic: Poles (Grizzly) (Read 306 times)

Jude
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Poles (Grizzly)
« Thread Started on Apr 5, 2005, 1:45pm »

This was written for Miss Rosie's birthday. It's very silly, but it very much fitted the occasion. Not taking it too seriously is probably sensible. Beware of innuendo, a complete lack of subtlety, and mild slashy undertones.

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“Do you know,” Evin Larse said, leaning back in his seat and surveying the jousting field before him, “I’ve never really liked jousting all that much.” “No?” Dom replied, eyebrows raised. “Why ever not?” “Well, doesn’t I feel slightly odd to you, you know, watching men point their poles at each other?” It took Dom several minutes to recover from the coughing fit that ensued from Evin’s comment. When he finally regained his composure, he was obviously trying very hard to keep a straight face. “Trust you to see it that way!” he said. “I have to say that it has never, ever crossed my mind.” Evin shook his head. I’m surprised at you! I thought the, uh, symbolism of jousting was glaringly obvious. And quite frankly, I feel rather uncomfortable with it.” He looked around restlessly. “Can we go?” His friend stared at him. “No, we can’t, we only just got here. Besides, Kel’s jousting later today, and I promised I’d stay and watch.” Evin response was to groan like a little child who has been told that he has to stay the night at his least favourite auntie’s house. Dom looked unimpressed. “Well you can go, if it upsets you so much. I like jousting, I’m not letting your pathetic innuendos put me off.” “It’s not a pathetic innuendo, Domitan,” said Evin in the tone of a long-suffering man. “It’s what jousting is all about, everybody secretly knows it, but nobody wants to admit it!” The other man’s unimpressed expression remained. “So what you’re saying is that the noble art of jousting isn’t about men staying in shape and having a chance to show off their skills in front of an audience, it’s about-“ “-men pointing their poles at each other in a way that won’t make their wives disown them, yes.” Evin interrupted, nodding enthusiastically. “So, who’s jousting first then?” “Oh… Sacherell of Wellam and Sir Douglass of Veldine.”
Evin smirked triumphantly. “Well then, I rest my case. Those two lovely bachelors are clearly pointing their poles at each other in more places than on the tournament field, if you ask me.” “Which I didn’t,” Dom said wearily. “Enough already. Your humour belongs in a sleeperhouse. And also, if this theory of yours is so wonderful, how do you explain the two lady knights’ involvement?” “You’re so simple, Dom!” Evin said, patting his friend on the head in a patronising manner. “I’ll wager more men than would care to admit it fantasise about pointing their pole at a lady knight!” Dom groaned. “Stop, stop! You’ve given too much thought to this.” “So who is the lovely Keladry jousting against?” asked Evin, still smirking.
“According to this… it’s Lord Wyldon of Cavall,” Dom replied, raising an eyebrow at his friend as if to say ‘take that’.
“Oh. Oh.” Evin screwed up his face in disgust. “That has created a truly horrible mental image.” “Serves you right for being so vulgar.” ______
“Dom?” Evin ventured, much later, when Sirs Douglass and Sacherell, and several others, had jousted.
“Mmm?” “Is it… is it your fantasy to, uh, you know with a lady knight?” “You’ll have to make yourself clearer, I’m afraid.” Dom turned an amused expression to his friend, who he was pleased to observe was turning a pleasant shade of pink. “I’m not quite sure what you’re getting at.” “You know! To point your pole at a lady knight!”
Dom returned his attention to the jousting. “I’m not a knight, so I don’t expect I’ll ever get the chance to joust.” He grimaced. “I’m not sure I’d want to, if I’m honest.” “Dom! Stop avoiding the issue!” Evin looked acutely embarrassed.
“Oh, all right, all right.” Dom turned back to face his friend. “No, it’s not. I have no interest in either of our lady knights in that way. Now would you please be quiet?” Evin smiled, his blush fading. “Oh, I am glad.” ______
“Is it yours?” “What?” “Well, is it your fantasy?” “No… truthfully, Dom, I can think of other people I’d much rather point my pole at.” “Then I suppose it’s my turn to be glad.”

« Last Edit: Apr 5, 2005, 4:25pm by Jude »

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Rosie
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Re: Poles (PG-13)
« Reply #1 on Apr 5, 2005, 2:22pm »

*insert comment about pointing poles at them here*

I just love this. It's so slashy and it has Douglass/Sacherell in it and there's nothing not to love.

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RiverDreamer
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Re: Poles (PG-13)
« Reply #2 on Apr 5, 2005, 2:37pm »

Quote:

“Oh. Oh.” Evin screwed up his face in disgust.

Wheeee!! Lord Wyldon pointing his pole!

I loved this the first time around, Jude. The second time is equally beautiful! Some classic Dom/Evin action. Well in character as well! And hooray for no Dom liking Kel!!

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